Boom! Bam! Eight months later, and here I am.

God, Chicago is a trip. Have I ever mentioned how awesome it is NOT to be in Utah anymore? Well, it’s awesome. Really, super, incredibly awesome. Almost as awesome as Miley Cyrus’ recent VMA performance (yeah, I like her, I said it. Place thine lips on my buttocks).

Because I’ve been working my tail off, enjoying the beach precisely 43 seconds behind my home, sweeping the incessant deluge of Lois hair off the floor, and basically engaging in your average 22-year-old’s dose of daily fuckery, I haven’t been posting in here as much. I apologize, dear readers, for my neglect.

I have been busy. But I think the reason I’m not posting like I used to also has something to do with the fact that I’m not antsy, irritable, or pissed off 24/7 like I used to be. That sounds odd, but I really do have this general sense of well being that I never before experienced. And somehow, it lessens my desire to blast the newspapers in Logan, UT, with columns decrying the general populace’s inanity.

Almost daily, whether while I”m standing in the shower, driving to work, or reading in my newly second-hand-furnished living room, I think to myself, “Man, life is swell.” It’s weird. My little Lizard brain isn’t used to experiencing a daily dose of satisfaction, but there it is, and I can’t do much about it.

I almost wish I had more to bitch about, so I’d have more interesting things to write on. Don’t get me wrong–there are still thoughts floating about in my noggin. Trying to wrap my head around the US’s incessantt warmongering, the current conflict in Syria, the national reading level, and the simple fact that salted caramel ice cream isn’t available everywhere; I mean, issues still exist. But, at least for the time being, they’ve taken a backseat to my general sense of well-being.

i guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m happy. Genuinely, truly happy. Coincidentally, I’m still poorer than I’ve ever been, and am learning some critical lessons about living in a ghetto-adjacent neighborhood well below the poverty line. And don’t get me wrong–I still sweat about job security, neighborhood safety, and the difficulty of locating that goddamn salted caramel frozen dairy deliciousness. But I’ve never experienced this wholesome, wonderful sense of contentedness before. Is this what Utah Mormons feel all the time?

Maybe. If so, I don’t blame them for staying in ignorant bliss. Hopefully soon, something will really trigger my ire, and I’ll start posting more interesting things again. But, till then, I thank you for your readership and encourage any of my discontent Utah readers to exodus the Matrix ASAP. There is much more awaiting you outside the margins of Mormonism.

Till then, yours in existential deliberation and stuff,


Our heroine eating a Chicago-style Cheesebooger cheesebooger cheesebooger! Chips, no fries.